This was not how I envisioned making my blogging comeback after a week's hiatus.
Early this morning, I'm lying in bed, thinking up some blog posting ideas that I'm fairly convinced will win me accolades, new readership, and possibly a free trip to BlogHer. I'm thinking I should write this brilliance down somewhere, before I forget everything. The brilliance must be recorded, you know.
And then all that brilliance? Thrown violently out of my head by a roach. Falling on my freakin' FACE.
On my face. In bed. My safe haven was violated, first thing in the morning.
He was large. He was very alive. He was FEARLESS.
My sanity is totally shattered, people.
I cannot tolerate but somewhat understand the concept of roaches in the kitchen. After all, the kitchen is where all the food is. The good stuff. The kitchen is where we sometimes leave dirty dishes and don't rinse them right away. (I know - condemnation is being heaped upon my head for admitting that.) The kitchen is the mecca of roach love: food in abundance, dark corners, moist areas courtesy of a slightly leaky dishwasher. What self-respecting bug would want to go anywhere else? What is there in a bedroom that is so appealing, except maybe to find yourself lost on the way to the kitchen?
But I'm now fairly convinced that my earlier declaration of victory was not only premature, but more like a taunt, a beckoning to the huge underground community of pestilence-spreading creatures to terrorize the living snot out of me. So they all got together in some sort of Roach Committee and elected one lucky soul, this kamikaze roach, to teach me a lesson. In my bed. My safe haven. VIOLATED.
It's been a good fifteen minutes since Kamikaze Roach was flung from my forehead, sprayed and shellacked by half a can of industrial-sized roach killing spray, and flushed down the toilet. I am still feeling the tiny scratches of roach limbs all over my body. I am still squarely in the middle of my bed, very very awake, looking around myself every 5 seconds to see if I am not alone anymore. I am having a very hard time NOT thinking about bugs crawling all over me again tonight, crawling all in my bed, crawling in my soon-to-be-born son's bassinet in the next room.
I am so disgusted, I can barely move. I certainly can't fall back asleep.
Internet, if there is anyone - ANYONE - out there who can get rid of these little creeps, I will sell my soul to them. No kidding. If I see one more bug, I think I will require restraining and intense, heavy sedation.
3 comments:
I have a professional pest control service (Massey) - but there are lots of them. They spray about once a quarter - and will come out anytime I call them (like when I see some wasps setting up home on my porch). House calls are free (with my quarterly fees). I have never seen a roach, or really any kind of bug, in my house.
First let me dance around screeching and swiping at my head even though nothing is there.
Bugs just freak me out. *shudder* I so agree with the sanity shattering from one being on your head. Ewww!
Boric acid will work, but not safe anywhere there are kids or pets. Though if you live somewhere where roaches are native, you kind of have to just get used to them or hire a professional sprayer to come out every few months. Other than that just intense cleaning really.
Living in Florida - well, roaches sort of come with the territory, I guess! The apartment that we moved from was automatically sprayed every 2-3 months - now it's up to us. The bug guy came out within hours of us calling yesterday, so hopefully it will keep the little critters at bay for a while longer...
Post a Comment